lift me up ♥

♥

so this is just a page where i can ramble on about things that bother me and such. you don’t have to read any of it. just nice to get it out.

♥ so i do not feel normal. and i don’t want to be normal. i’m disgusted by all the normalness and by how everybody just wants to look like everybody else instead of being themselves. we are all unique. and yes, then right after that someone’ll say that: “OH, IF WE’RE ALL UNIQUE, THEN WE’RE ALL NORMAL!” and no, i disagree. cause being unique is: not looking like someone else. even though people try their hardest to dress and look like everybody else, they will always be unique. but they refuse. hide. are people afraid to be a joke? i know no one wants to be a laugh, but i believe in being yourself.
therefore i am. and eventhough it’s hard sometimes to maintain it, i will keep on, cause i don’t want to be like other people, look like all the other girls. be remembered as one of many.
one of my favorites quotes: be yourself - everyone else is already taken. ♥

♥ so how can you feel this about another person? i keep continuing to love him more and more. know him more and more. it’s scary. cause the i’m-gonna-miss-out-on-so-much-if-i-don’t-try-other-people-feeling is fading away. like i don’t miss out on anything cause this is evolving all the time, it’s new all the time.
it’s some scary shit. but i freaking love him. i feel like fucking bella swan (- which is ridiculous cause i kinda hate her. well. hate kristen stewart too. i think it’s because she reminds me of myself.. which is just SO weird.. but that’s a whole other ramble - maybe i’ll mention it here some time) and i’m afraid how to handle it if i lose him - so it’s fucking dangerous to get this involved. feels like we’re one person. but i also love it. everybody should have the chance to feel this way. ♥

♥ i just get SO scared, when i look at all those blogs with girls who don’t eat anything, because they want to become skinny. and a lot of them ARE skinny! it’s scary because i’m one of them on the inside. but i would never starve myself. i would never mistreat my body and myself that way. i know my oppinion of my own body is messed up - i know i am a skinny girl from nature’s side - but i am not satisfied. i try to be. i really do. but it’s hard for me to look at all those thinspo blogs and proana- and -mia blogs. i am a strong person - i don’t let things like that get to me, but i’m so afraid that all those girls who are not strong will get into it and become ill. it’s a mental disease. and it’s one of the worst i can think of. the distorted image you have of yourself. not only your body, but also your personality. i don’t know how it has gotten this far. if all parents around the world knew how many sites there are with girls (and boys) starving and self-loathing.. they would be shocked. i don’t know if it’s society that has gotten it this far. shit is fucked up. minds are fucked up. image of beauty is sick and twisted. i hope every girl will wake up one day and realize how beautiful she is just the way she is. ♥